Five Shitty Things About Me:

1) i often say ‘i’m trying to come up with a way to say…’ or ‘i want to say…’ to avoid admitting i don’t want to craft a tactful or respectful way of saying something rude / mean / hurtful.

2) i ‘warn’ people about my many weaknesses of character and negative traits, as though being able to point back to that warning somehow absolves me for my inappropriate / unacceptable behaviour that inevitably comes up. As in “i warned you, i don’t know why you’re acting like this is a surprise”.

3) i say “question” before asking questions. in my head, it’s “Question:” with caps and a colon.

4) i will publicly and loudly ridicule others to draw attention away from myself. this is shitty, but it’s also how i learned to stop being a playground whipping boy, and it is, sadly, still an effective tactic in pseudo-adult situations in my day to day life.

5) i am overwhelmingly susceptible to buying in to my own hype, no matter how minor and unimpressive that hype may be.

Feel free to join in. (By that I meant, do your own, not add to a list of my failings. But hey, either works.)